My Relationship With Alcohol

It’s hard for me to even begin to write this blog post because I remember thinking about writing it over a year ago, but truly not knowing if I would ever get to the point where I could. I say that because I’ve always loved to drink! I never really thought I could give up my nightly glass of wine. I didn’t want to enough. We all know the saying “it’s 5 o’clock somewhere.” Well for me, it was 7 o’clock somewhere cause I would usually wait until we put the kids to bed to open a bottle of wine and cozy up on the couch with my husband to watch our nightly show.

And I loved this routine so much, that even though I contemplated (multiple times) whether or not I was drinking too much, I wasn’t willing to give up this routine in order to cut back. I’m going to get more into this part of the story because I think it’s important, but I guess I just wanna start this post by saying that I’m so proud that I’m able to write it now! A post I never believed I could write, because I didn’t think I could really change my relationship with alcohol nor did I REALLY want to. But I’ve gotten to a point where I finally feel confident in my ability to actually control this relationship. And that truly is something to celebrate! But probably not with a champagne toast. Ha.

My Sober Curious Journey

So, where to really begin. I guess I’ll start from the very beginning – when I first started drinking. I was young. Very young. I don’t wanna get into too many specifics, but my entire life I was the young kid. I started kindergarten when I was 4 years old and I was almost the very youngest kid in my class. There was one other student named Mike B. I won’t give his full name for privacy purposes. But his birthday was literally one day after mine on September 17th. And the reason it’s so crazy that I remember not only his first name, but last name, is because I have the worst memory ever! I think I told you guys this but I barely remember 70% of the people in my small 95-person graduating class by name. Of course I remember my closer friends but it’s just really hard for me to remember names and things in general. But not only do I remember his first and last name, I remember his birthday because it was one day after mine which meant I wasn’t the very youngest in my class.

Anyway, because I was the youngest, I always wanted to be older. I counted the days until I got my license, I started dressing older way too young, I started sneaking out of my house when I was just a pre-teen. I didn’t go to the senior year of my high school, and instead did something called a senior waiver, so I could take college classes. I moved out of my house when I was so young – 15 years to be exact. My poor mother couldn’t control me – I was A LOT. I just wanted to grow up quickly because I was always the young kid. And I think that’s why I started drinking young too. (BTW, if you’ve been following my Molly story, this all plays into my feelings on that as well)

The pic above is my friends and I dressed as the Spiced Girls for a school talent show. I was Ginger.

Then I Grew Up

So going out and having drinks with friends was a theme not only in my teens, but definitely throughout college and my 20s. Then I hit my early 30s and started having babies. I remember around this time that I started wondering if I was drinking too much. But when I got pregnant with Molly, I did not have one single drop of alcohol touch my lips the entire time I was pregnant, so that gave me the validation I needed to know that I wasn’t dependent on alcohol. Same when I was pregnant with Riley. Not one drop of alcohol consumed. And while that might not seem like a huge achievement to many, I did have friends that would have a half a glass here or there later in their pregnancy and I thought because I didn’t have any, that meant I definitely was in complete control over my alcohol consumption.

After giving birth to Riley, I still had a good grip on drinking and wasn’t drinking very often because I was breastfeeding him for the first 8 months of his life, and then the year after that I introduced alcohol back pretty consistently. But there were so many articles out there saying red wine was good for you, and it was just so normal to have wine out at dinner and at the end of the day that it never crossed my mind as something that was truly bad for me. In fact, it was so ingrained in my brain from media articles (that got shared millions of times across social media) that red wine was actually good for me. I know now that is so not true.

Pandemic Drinking

Then the pandemic hit. And I, like so many other people, started drinking more. Being home all day every day and not able to go anywhere justified opening a bottle of wine before the kids went to bed. It justified having wine on the weekends. And I know I keep saying wine, but it was also margaritas and beer and champagne! Again, I wasn’t doing anything crazy. I still felt in complete control early on in the pandemic. I think it was about a year in when I started realizing that it was a little much. So I would not drink for a couple nights just to prove to myself I could and because if I could make it those couple nights, in my mind it justified that I didn’t have any sort of alcoholism. And like I mentioned at the beginning, I still wouldn’t call my relationship with alcohol “alcoholism” because I could stop when I needed to. I think this was about changing my relationship with alcohol as the norm instead of the outlier.

So, from the start of the pandemic until basically September of last year I thought multiple times that maybe I should stop drinking as much or maybe I shouldn’t pour a glass of wine at the end of the night, but it just seemed so much easier to have the glass of wine. I would SO look forward to it at the end of the day, and here’s the thing. It didn’t affect me the next day. I actually felt fine in the morning. I didn’t feel like I was going to bed drunk – just sleepy. And I would wake up and exercise for an hour and feel great! In fact, the times that I did try cutting alcohol out for a few days here and there, I felt no better in the morning then on the days I had drinks. I’ve also heard from people that their sleep suffers when they drink. That wasn’t the case for me. I slept like a baby when I had a few glasses of wine before bed. (However that has changed now that I don’t drink much. My sleep REALLY suffers now if I drink). So there was no real reason for me to want to stop other than just realizing that it’s not a great idea to have alcohol every night.

The Shift – Sober Curious

Anyway, the main gist of the journey is that I wanted to start this years ago. But I never quite had the motivation or reason enough to do it because I felt so good. But then something shifted in me in late August early September 2022. I started seeing articles about people being “sober curious.” I don’t necessarily love that term, even though I have used it, because I don’t know enough about alcoholism and the people who really truly suffer from it their entire lives. I wouldn’t want to claim a word like ‘sober,’ when it could mean so much more to someone else who is truly struggling. But essentially there’s just been a movement of people trying to cut back on alcohol, and that really intrigued me. Then I started following doctors on Instagram, who talked about the effects of alcohol. I read a book called The Naked Mind that truly opened my eyes. I highly recommend getting it yourself. It talks about how society treats alcohol (which is a drug) like it’s the best thing that could happen to us. When in fact, alcohol kills so many people and it’s objectively bad for us. It also just explores so many things about alcohol and myths that we’ve been fed for years and debunks them. Like the idea that red wine is good for you. I think you’d have to drink like 20 bottles of red wine tonight to get the antioxidant benefits that some articles claim. I can’t remember the exact numbers, but read the book and you’ll see what I mean. It just really opened my eyes to the fact the alcohol is in fact, poison. It’s not good for you. And that realization really helped me decide that I needed and WANTED to cut back.

CBD and Alcohol

Here is where CBD comes in. And I’m gonna start with being extremely transparent here. This is not a sponsored post, and I do not get paid to share my feelings on CBD with all of you, but I legitimately cannot tell my alcohol story without talking about CBD. I truly believe in my heart that I would not have been able to cut back initially, and even continue to cut back, without the help of CBD. That said, I do have a very small percentage, I think 3%, of equity in FOCL so if it ever succeeds I would benefit from that. But the reason I chose equity in the company instead of payment when I decided to work for them is because I believe so strongly in their CBD and its ability to help people. So now that I’ve gotten this little spiel out of the way, let me tell you how CBD has helped me.

I, like many of you, turned to my nightly glass of wine or any drink really to help me do one of two things. Either relax at the end of a long day, or to help me loosen up and be more outgoing in social gatherings.

Let’s talk about winding down at home. The fear of not being able to have that release at the end of the day was the biggest thing keeping me from cutting back on drinking. I had been taking broad-spectrum CBD for a while and it definitely helped me calm down in general and I loved it. So back in August/September when I really made a conscious decision to cut back on alcohol, I made sure that at about 60-90 minutes before I would put the kids to bed, I would take CBD. Either I would take a supplement or pop a couple gummies. I realized that it helped me abstain from alcohol so much. I would also take a dropper full of the sleep CBD right before bed. It made me sleep GREAT (seriously the BEST) however, it didn’t fully do the trick to terms of cutting out the alcohol. I still found myself wanting to have a drink at the end of the night. Something about the oral fixation or even just the process of having a liquid drink was something I needed. So I started replacing my glass of wine with a cup of tea. This process was super helpful for me. I even started adding droppers of my CBD to my tea at the end of the night to help me relax even more. If this is something you want to try I highly recommend you consider getting FOCL (Use code AM20 for 20% off if  you try it, you can use this code over and over! ). They have both broad-spectrum CBD (great for anxiety and sleep) and Full Spectrum CBD.

Oh and also, if you re-order go to the highlight for CBD on my instagram page cause there are a bunch of other codes you can use for future purchases (you can’t use each code more than once)

Just for clarity, this link is for broad-spectrum CBD – which works wonders for anxiety and sleep. That’s very different from full-spectrum which I’m about to get to, because oh my gosh did that change everything for me.


That’s right, once I discovered full spectrum CBD it changed the game. I want to start by saying that full spectrum CBD has trace amounts of THC in it. So if you get drug tested for THC, you’ll want to avoid this. However, the benefits of THC have been widely studied and I highly recommend you talk to your doctor about it (again I’m not a medical professional and can’t give medical advice). For me it’s been incredible – and let me just be completely honest here. This is coming from someone who has tried marijuana in the past and hated it. It made me feel out of control, weird and I didn’t like it. So I didn’t know how I was going to feel about this. However, it’s completely different. Because it has such a tiny tiny tiny trace amount of THC, you just get a buzz after taking it (buzz might not even be the right word. Just a release). Just like if you were to have a glass of wine. But without the alcohol! I’m not a doctor, so I’m not going to make any claims on what’s healthy and what’s not in this blog post. But I personally believe and have read only good things about the benefits of CBD and small amounts of THC, and I love it!!!! So if you’ve tried regular CBD in the past and you didn’t feel like it did much for you, I highly highly highly recommend trying full-spectrum CBD. And FYI you can use AM20 to get 20% off and believe me when I tell you it’s worth every penny. Save the code in your phone or somewhere because you can use it again and again every time you reorder – and I truly believe you WILL reorder.

Not only do I use it, but so many of my friends do and we legit sit around the game table, playing mahjong talking about how much it has helped us all in different ways. One of my friends suffers from extreme back pain and it’s helped her, the other can’t sleep at night and if she has wine it keeps her up all night so it’s helped her a ton. For me, I just have a lot of anxiety at the end of the day and it’s helped me relax so I can fall asleep peacefully even faster than with just Broad Spectrum CBD. There’s even different CBD‘s for daytime and nighttime. However, I wouldn’t take full spectrum during the day, unless I was in a situation where I could have been drinking all day and be OK with it, if that makes sense. I mostly just take it at night when I have nowhere to go.

Drink Something Else – Replacing Alcohol with CBD Mocktails and Tea

Anyway, I wanna move away from the CBD conversation but it truly is a huge part of the reason I’ve been able to change my relationship with alcohol. But if CBD isn’t for you, that’s cool too. Or maybe it’s not in your budget right now cause I know times are tight. I would say my other major tip for changing your relationship with alcohol is finding a different drink to have at night. For some people, that might be a mocktail, or a cup of tea, or maybe a 1 to 3Life! Ha! Had to throw my company in there. When I first starting cutting back and would find myself really craving a glass of wine and I would tell myself that I could have one after I had a cup of tea. And what usually ended up happening is that after I have my tea I didn’t even really want the wine anymore. I wasn’t even craving the wine or the alcohol. I was just craving a drink. So try this too! Even if you do end up drinking the glass of wine after, maybe by having the tea first, you’re only gonna have one glass rather than two or three. Play around with it.

How Much I Currently Drink

So you might be curious how much I do drink now. And the answer is it depends. In January, I think I had drinks on 4 of the days throughout the month. Then this month, so far I think I’ve had drinks on 6 different days. To some of you, this might not seem like a big accomplishment, but for me it is. Especially when I had gotten in the habit of having a glass or two almost every night. So I’ve cut back significantly and I’ve also made the rule that I no longer open a bottle of wine at home for no reason – I want to enjoy my wine or cocktails when there is reason to celebrate. When I choose to have a drink for the experience of enjoying a special cocktail or a nice glass of wine. Or the experience of being social with others (yes, I feel like wine loosens me up in social settings, although the book I recommend would say otherwise). But never just because. Does this mean I’m never going to have a glass of wine at home with my husband for no reason ever again? No. Just a sort of a rule of thumb. I’m trying not to do that and haven’t so far this year. I think that’s a healthy mindset to have and I’m proud of it.

The very last thing I want to address that I hope those of you reading this, and really our society as a whole starts changing the narrative, is when it comes to people choosing to not drink, or to drink less. What I found so interesting in this process of me sharing my journey to drink less alcohol is the amount of messages I got from people asking if I had a problem with alcohol, and I think that narrative needs to change. When we hear that someone stopped drinking, we might be curious to ask questions because we want to change our own relationship with alcohol. Which is a good thing! But the response should never be to assume that that person decided not to drink because they had a problem with alcohol. I mentioned this in my Instagram stories the other day, but I think it’s worth mentioning here too. I was out to dinner with some friends the other night and one of them brought this example to my attention and I just find it very interesting – I’m going to use the example of soda here because I think it’s a better comparison. But if you offered someone a soda and they said, “No thank you, I don’t drink soda anymore,” you wouldn’t really think twice about it. Maybe some of you would ask why, but again that “why” would be stemming from questioning your consumption of soda and deep down wanting to cut back and wondering why somebody else cut back. Maybe you’re worried about the sugar or the amount of money you spend on soda, etc. etc. But chances are you wouldn’t say much and most people wouldn’t even comment. You certainly wouldn’t assume or ask if that person had a problem with soda.

Now let’s switch the narrative and say that you offered somebody a drink and they said I don’t drink anymore. It’s natural for us because of the way alcohol is presented in our society to assume there must be some major reason why this person doesn’t drink. It seems odd and strange that somebody wouldn’t drink alcohol. But why? Why do we assume someone has a problem with alcohol because they chose to stop drinking? Or in my case choose to drink less. It’s just something to ponder. And again I’m going to mention it, but I really think The Naked Mind or Quit Like a Woman are amazing books to help you wrap your mind around this concept and ponder it even more.

To Wrap it Up

This is getting long, so I’ll stop here. I think this is mostly what I wanted to say. If you have any questions for me, please ask them in the comments below and I’ll do my best to answer. Again I’m not a doctor and none of this is medical advice. I just wanted to share my story with you guys on what’s helped me and why I decided to make a change. I don’t have any plans on fully giving up alcohol at this time. And for those of you who do fully give it up – great, amazing! For me, I just truly enjoy it and I’m so dang proud of myself for adjusting my relationship with it. So, don’t beat yourself up, take it one step at a time, and I hope in some small way this blog post inspired you to examine your own relationship with alcohol, especially if you were already sober curious. I love you guys!


If you or someone you love needs help with alcohol please seek treatment. This blog is only to share my one experience and not to help treat alcoholism. Take care of yourselves and those you love!

99 Thoughts

99 thoughts on “My Relationship With Alcohol

      1. Probably because she’s selling CBD 🙄
        I’m disappointed, I actually thought she was genuinely sharing something from the heart for once. But of course, couldn’t even get through one blog post without advertising promo codes 🙁

    1. Thank you for sharing. It’s a very important conversation to have especially in our post pandemic society. We all need to take a look at our vices. Side note: The font on your blog is hard to read. Any chance you can darken it? My eyes were struggling by the end!

    1. I am honestly just so happy that so many people are reading it which tells me so many other people are possibly interested doing that same!

  1. Hi Ali! I’m so glad you decided to share this. Full transparency, I’m a recovering alcoholic, and I have to say, it’s a breath of fresh air to me seeing that so many people are having this conversation. To be honest, I’m not concerned with what label you give it, it doesn’t offend me that the word sober is used (even though I am one of the people you mentioned who struggled A LOT because of my alcoholism), I’m just glad to hear that for coming generations, hopefully, there will be more information. There will be more guidance. I do not wish what I went through on my worst enemy, and I am so so grateful that I was able to come out of it, but SO many people aren’t. I totally agree with what you say, it should be completely normal for someone to want to stop drinking or drink less, even if they are not an alcoholic. I also wish, that those of us who are, would not get judged so much because we are – what I mean is, there are situations when I wish I could just say “I don’t drink because I’m an alcoholic” but I know the repercussions of that. Thank you for opening up, I’m glad you’re feeling so at peace with this; and regardless of whatever your reasoning is behind it, or if you chose to drink more in the future, or give up drinking all together – I think asking yourself that question takes courage (at least it did for me), and doing something about it, even more so. Thanks for your honesty. Much love.

    1. Catalina, Thank you for sharing this. I could cry reading it. I completely agree that this needs to be talked about more and I LOVE that more and more people are starting to have this conversation with both themselves and others! So proud of you!!!!! Thanks for reading my blog and for being so great 🙂

  2. Oh my gosh! This resonates with me so much! I read the Naked Mind (GREAT book!!), but what was even more helpful was listening to Dr Huberman’s podcast on what alcohol does to the brain! Please listen to it! I haven’t drank for just over 5 weeks now! I want to change my relationship with alcohol too, because I LOVE it! It became too much of a hobby for me! Nice work Ali! I love how you are real & don’t pretend life is

      1. He can get scientific but just do your best. It is 2 hours long, and it truly took me a month to get through it, because it resonated so hard with me, I had to keep replaying parts to get it engrained in my head. So crazy to get a reply from you and I LOVE following you and your FB doesn’t let me “react” to your stories. Keep being real!!! ♥️

    1. It can feel SO repetitive at points but the book explains that it is by design to be that way! I hope it helps you like it helped me!

  3. Thank you so much for sharing this! I also have always loved drinking and once I became pregnant and a mom when I was 30, I seriously had to examine my relationship with alcohol and I made some drastic changes with the frequency and amount that I consumed. It’s been almost 5 years now & I’m so proud to say that while I do enjoy a few drinks for special occasions, the amount that I drink is so few and far between and it’s been life changing. Thank you for being so open and transparent about this topic because I’m sure you will have helped someone maybe look a little more closely at their own lives and how changing their relationship to alcohol could be beneficial to them too

    1. That is my hope!!!! I really feel that this is an important topic and needs more attention! And awesome that you were able to cut back too!

  4. This, 100%! Thank you for sharing. The culture of everyday drinking has become so normalized that explaining why I’m not drinking has become “a-typical” Mommy drinking has become a social norm and for me it felt like it needed a “time-out”
    to reflect on it’d bad behavior. Lol

    I loved a great night out, planning and entertaining a great party, staying up drinking a great bottle or two of wine. I am now obsessed with waking up clear headed after not drinking (tea with cbd/thc for the win) and ready to take on the day.

    We may decide to have a drink down the road but I haven’t had the urge. Thank you for telling your truth. It’s going to help the next person from questioning why we are stopping at one glass of wine instead of two, or not drinking at all.

    1. The CBD/Micro doses of THC combo helps SO help!!! Which it sounds like you get too! I just need some sort of release at night but wake up feeling great after AMAZING sleep!

      For me, I’ve realized I really love a great cocktail or glass of wine but ONE and maaaayeb TWO. But that’s it and not often. It makes when I do have them that much more enjoyable. And who knows, maybe eventually I will stop all together. But for now, I still enjoy it is moderation 🙂

  5. Thank you for sharing your story! I’m in my 40’s and never have been a big drinker. As a mom with small kids, I feel like I get judged by the other moms and left out because I don’t enjoy drinking or partying. I’ve questioned if something was wrong with me for not wanting to drink so I could be “a cool mom”. I think society definitely plays a big part in making alcohol consumption on a regular basis seen as normal. Thanks for stepping out of your comfort zone and sharing with us!

    1. I’m so sorry you have felt that. I get it. I have felt it from some people and I still drink, just not as much. I hope more people talking about this will start to help chnage the narrative.

    2. You mentioned that you would drink in the evening with your husband. I’m curious if you started cutting back together or if you started the journey on your own while he still had nightly drinks?

  6. Hi Ali! Love your story! I am trying to order from your line with FOCL and your discount code is not working. I have tried adding 2 products even 3 and it says the code can not be applied.

  7. Thank you so much for this. My husband is a recovering alcoholic and still has relapses. I don’t keep alcohol at home, and I don’t drink much when I’m out (on the seldom occasion!), because my body doesn’t like alcohol anymore. I feel completely left out from friend and co-worker groups, because I choose not to drink. And I find that when I’m out to dinner, I actually feel guilty if I DON’T order a drink. Like I’m doing the restaurant a disservice because I don’t want alcohol. I’m so glad you’re taking steps to change the narrative around drinking. It’s a lonely world for those who choose not to drink.

    1. I hate that for you! It so strange how we are conditioned to think it’s weird when someone doesn’t drink! I really hope this narrative changes! I think it is starting to!

  8. So awesome sharing your story. You are a beautiful Wife and mom to those littles. I’ve followed you since the Batchelor/Bachelorette days. Love the Mannos. Again thank you for sharing this and your family with all if us. Lots of love from Utah ♥️♥️♥️

  9. Hi Ali~~

    First off, I absolutely love following you and your journey of life!! Thank you for sharing this! And for always being so open about things! I have 2 girls (6 and 8) Who love when Molly and Riley are in your stories! I began drinking way more during the Pandemic and was able to recognize and slow down! Just keep being you as we love you and your family! Peace for Chicago!!!!

  10. Thank you for this! I love your honesty and realness! We need more of this. I’m 50 and have always had these same thoughts about my nightly glass of wine. Thank you for clarifying my thoughts are valid. I’m so going to try the full spectrum cbd. Do you use the 1000 or 3000?

    1. Hi Tina! I use 1000mg – Starts with 1000 mg and then you can increase as you learn what works best for you. I started with 1 dropper of 1000mg in my nighttime tea, but now I’ll use 2 or 3 droppers, so I will probably move to 3000mg soon

  11. Thanks Ali for always being so vulnerable with your followers. You are the most authentic person I have ever followed and truly the only influencer who I actually believe when you say something. As someone who really doesn’t ever drink alcohol solely because I don’t like the taste of it (I don’t drink pop either because I don’t like carbonation) I agree I think it should be normalized that if someone doesn’t want or like to drink people shouldn’t assume they have a problem with alcohol or is pregnant

  12. This is such a great post. I think this could benefit so many. Are you taking 1000 mg full spectrum?

    Thanks for writing about this.


    1. I use 1000mg – I suggest starting smaller and increase as you learn what’s best for you. For example I started with 1 dropper of 1000mg in my nighttime tea, but now I’ll use 2 or 3 droppers, so I will probably move to 3000mg with my next order. Get more bang for your buck!

  13. I have been having a nightly cup of tea for about 5 years now. This ritual is very important to me for relaxing before bed. Sometimes I drink herbal or sometimes decaf black or Chai tea with milk and sweetener. Such a nice way to wind down.

  14. Ali, I read The Naked Mind a year ago and it changed my life too! Like you, I struggle with anxiety and I thought alcohol was a remedy. I have been alcohol free for over a year now and I have never been more free and content. Thank you for being open and vulnerable to share your journey with others. It is inspiring to hear the ways you are taking charge of your health and making it a priority. Cheers to less anxiety to make room for more peace in life!

    1. Congrats on making it over a year! Truly incredible. And thank you for responding to this post with kindness 🙂 I was so nervous to post it.

  15. Wow, what an ad grab. The article url: cbd as article replacement. And what kind of influence is swap your alcohol with my CBD. Seriously? This blog stinks so much of desperation to push your ads it’s actually sad. I feel sorry for those suffering with alcoholism like you’ve used to make yourself similar to those with an actual disease just for click bait.
    Sad Ali, so sad. Check yourself and your advise- way out of your lane.

    1. I’m sorry you feel that way. I don’t do SEO for my blogs so I didn’t make the URL. But I don’t understand why you think it’s bad. This is also not an ad (and ad assumes you are paid ot post it). I will not make any money off the sale of CBD from this blog post. I tried to make that clear, I’m sorry you feel this way. CBD is just a huge part of my story. Wishing you the best.

      1. You say it’s not an ad because you aren’t getting paid to post it. But if you have shares in the company, those rules are a bit different. Any sale made helps you! The rule that it only counts as an ad if you get paid only applies to people who have no stakes in a company! And you have your own promo code which you’re promoting which also helps you!
        You could’ve just mentioned CBD with no brand. THEN it wouldn’t be an ad. But you’re promoting a specific brand so yes, it changes the vibe of this post.

  16. Thank you so much for sharing this! My husband stopped drinking a few years ago simply because he has eczema and felt like giving it up helped his skin so much. He still gets the weird looks and questions when he says he doesn’t drink. I use cbd for my anxiety and sleep and it has made a huge difference. I have also cut down on wine because honestly don’t like how it messes up my sleep.

    1. SO happy for your husband! I huge accomplishment. And thank you for sharing your experience with CBD. It really has helped me so much too!

  17. I am glad for you and your accomplishment. I am wondering though…Isn’t CBD just switching one vice for another? Wouldn’t it be even better for you if you didn’t need/want alcohol or CBD?? I mean no disrespect… I just am not understanding. (Especially since it appeared you were taking a lower dose of CBD… and will be increasing.) Isn’t that like developing an immunity to something that you need more of it to get the same effects? Either way. Thank you for being you.

    1. I tried to explain this in my post (but it’s hard to cover everything which is why I was so nervous to post this!) but the benefits of CBD have been studied and from what I understand are great. Plus is natural . I think of it like switching out coffee for matcha. And matcha is supposed to be amazing for you!

      1. Isn’t alcohol natural too though? Fermentation is a natural, biological process. I also think it is switching one vice for another. Maybe CBD is better than alcohol, I haven’t done the research but I did find it strange that the post turned from abstaining, to actually just swapping it out for something else. Doesn’t really seem like that much of a difference. I’m not against alcohol or CBD (or you!) but the whole CBD part was definitely a bit odd to me and took away from the accomplishment of cutting back on alcohol. Tbh, it made me think “oh okay well I won’t be cutting back because I won’t be introducing CBD” as though I’ll need CBD to help me cut back.

  18. While it is wonderful that you have cut back your drinking, the concerning thing is you have replaced it with something else that you admitted gives you a “buzz”. This should still concern you as an addictive behavior. My father was an alcoholic and when he gave up alcohol he chose another addictive habit or behavior. This may help someone give up alcohol but not necessarily work on the true problem of addiction.

    1. I was thinking the same thing. It seems like you are ignoring the root of your problem. What is causing the anxiety that is causing you to need alcohol or CBD? CBD is also a drug.. I definitely agree we as a society have a toxic relationship with alcohol.

    2. I totally hear what you are saying. But from what I have read there are many healing and even medical benefits for CBD/trace amounts of THC. So I do think it is different. In my mind it’s like giving up coffee for matcha. And Matcha is so good for you! But I’m not a doctor. Just sharing my experience! Thanks for reading and for caring 🙂

  19. Girl…. I HOPE my purchase benefits you!!! I AM YOU!!! Lord, the pandemic! I know this story all too well.. You sound so happy and I look forward to receiving the product. I pray it does the same for me as it did for you. Much Love.

    1. Like I mentioned this is not an ad. SO I don’t get paid. But I hope the company succeeds some day because one day I could benefit. But the real reason I chose to get involved in the company and NOT take money is because I believe in it so much! I hope CBD helps you like is has for me.

  20. ali, i have been following you on social media for years. you seem like a loving, caring person and such a darling mom. i applaud all your successes in your personal life as well as your business life ! but after reading your “story,” it seems that you are minimizing your “relationship” with alcohol. alcoholism isnt how much you drink or how you feel because of it. its the need and want of a drink. please do not lull yourself into to thinking you have it under control. its like a strict diet for domeone who has an overeating problem-

    1. Maybe. Maybe not. I am just trying to be respectful of people who have truly suffered because of alcoholism and I didn’t want to take away from those struggles. I don’t always know the right thing to say. I’m just doing my best 🙂

  21. I feel like I’m addicted to soda so I would eventually like to stop drinking so much of it everyday. The same things you said about alcohol could be directed towards soda as well, or other things. I feel like soda has overtaken me and I can’t go without it in my house. I do have your 1 to 3 Life drinks. You should make a watermelon flavor. That would be cool.’so I’ve gotta work on my soda addiction.

    1. Sugar is SOOO addicting so I completely understand this! I hope you are able to cut back more and more everyday. I’m cheering you on! And stay tuned for some flavor announcements in the future 😉

  22. This is great!!
    Cutting back is big! The education out there on low-Alch and non-Alch is available.
    If you want a substitute because your used to having a glass in hand and need to transition maybe something like FRE or Napa Luminara which is Alch-Free.

    Thanks for sharing your story Ali!

  23. I love this! I’ve never drank in my life – grew up super conservative Christian in a denomination that abstains from alcohol. And I’ll tell you what- I have never once needed it. I’ve been curious, yes – I’ve taken a sip of champagne and HATED it. Beer reminds me of my alcoholic absent father so I won’t touch it w a 10 foot pole. Anyway- I’ve never once in my life felt less-than for not drinking. But I do get super annoyed when I hang out w people and turn down drinks and they’re all like “why?!” I’m definitely viewed as the weirdo sometimes and people just don’t understand. I’m not offended, just annoyed. I go on with my happy life. I am lucid, I don’t lose control over my actions, I’m healthier, and my kid will never have to worry about me being drunk. I’m 41 now and wouldn’t have it any other way. I’m so glad more people have come to realize this recently. Your family will enjoy you so much more! Stay strong!

  24. I too had come to a spot where I wanted to drink less and find other ways. Thank you so much for sharing your story and hopefully society can hop on board when comes to the questions!

  25. ali, ive followed you on social media for years. you seem like a lovely and caring person, and a wonderful mom. i am happy for your successes personally and professionally. please be careful about this info you are sharing. alcoholism is not about how much you drink or how you feel the next day. its about how much you need and want that drink. i think it is a mistake for your followers to possibly “rationalize “ their drinking problems and do what you are doing, when they may have a serious addiction. whatever you choose to do for yourself is great, but hopefully it doesnt mislead people into thinking they too can control their problem, when in reality they shouldnt be drinking at all. its a tricky thing that you can “influence” so may people- i know you had may disclaimers about your journey, but it may mislead a lot of people who need serious professional help.

  26. I love helping women evaluate their relationship with alcohol. Most everyone loses the desire to drink after working with me. Life’s too big for low bar goals like “drink the right amount on the right occasions”. Good for you for sharing your experience. Loved the soda reference. Keep going! Keep growing! Keep exploring!

  27. I found dry January to be such an interesting social experiment. I did it about a decade ago for the first time before it was mainstream. People couldn’t resist the urge to make comments. Like, it really bothered some people to the point where they were trying to twist my arm to “just have one”. Or so many questions about “why”. It was interesting to me that it bothered them more than me and I finally realized it was because I was like a mirror for their own drinking habits.

  28. I stopped drinking alcohol a few years ago, when I was realizing that the tiny benefit (comfort with others, “fitting in”, social “norms”, etc) were not worth the way I would feel as my heart would be racing laying in bed that night, or the migraine it would trigger the next day. There is such a stigma around why people choose to not drink, and I wish it weren’t that way. The fact you’re generally questioned in group settings on why you aren’t having a drink is unfortunate! Growing up with an alcoholic father and seeing the hurt and destructiveness it caused my family— I don’t wish that on anyone. . Good for you for recognizing that something was potentially becoming problematic, and then taking steps to change it. Sending love. Now it’s time for MY nightly tea!

  29. I could have written this post ! This is my exact journey now. I have been having the same struggle for several years. The same habit and challenges to overcoming it. I also had an uptick with Covid and read Quit like a woman and finally turned a corner the last two months and have had a huge decrease In my drinking and I have also started CBD / low dose THC beverages some times (yay for legalization up here in Canada !). So whenever I saw your post I was so curious if it was similar to me. Thanks so much for sharing. It’s been so eye opening learning how awful alcohol truly is for your health and how we perpetuate the drinking moms life which I am working hard not to do anymore …. Xoxo all the best ! Been following you for years 🙂

  30. I think there are millions who have been in your shoes, especially with the pandemic. I have done the same thing this last few months, but for now I have completely cut it out. Not forever but wanna be healthier. On the side note, thc is not good for you, I have taken it for years every night for sleep, thinking it’s beneficial , and it’s now giving me the craziest heart palpitations, it’s scary. I also had to cut that out, my sleep isn’t very good but I’m working on it. Wishing you the best in your journey and relationship with alcohol. I don’t think you have to explain yourself to every hate comment, haters gonna hate.

  31. Hi Ali, first of, love you and your openess and honesty! I have always been the girl that doesn’t drink much, and just simply don’t care to be hung over or not in control of myself, if that makes sense. But, it’s also like you said, people don’t comprehend why I would rather not have a drink. They literally peer pressure you into having one, and why? Our society has created such a backwards narrative! My son is almost 21, and we have let him try some adult beverages in a safe setting, but I also explain why it’s ok to drink less or not at all! Why is it cool to be drunk? I mean really. Who really truly enjoys that? I think people enjoy that escape from their own head, but why go to the extreme. I personally don’t smoke or use much of any types of aids, but, I also believe that things like thc are better! I am proud of you for wanting to change the narrative and I only hope more people do the same! Again, drinking, in general not the worst thing, but like everything else, in moderation, in the right environment for the right reasons! Thanks for sharing and reading my ramblings!

  32. Thank you for sharing your story! It’s hard for me to put myself in your shoes because I’m not a drinker. I did grow up with a father who drank a few glasses of wine every night. He was never mean or not there for us, but I can say that when I got married, I was happy my husband was not a drinker. Good for you for doing this for yourself and for your children.

    1. You’re so right. I didn’t make that clear. He would drink the same as me. Everything I mentioned above was pretty much our routine together

  33. Thanks for this Ali. I’ve never been a big drinker and people sometimes think it’s weird I don’t want to just go out to a bar and drink. I’ll certainly have a drink for a special occasion or on vacation, but not in my everyday life. I hate the idea that a lot of people seem to have that you need alcohol to have fun. I think as a society we need to start sending a different message about alcohol.

  34. I love this story! I have always enjoyed reading your blog because you are so real. I relate to this so much and have already added these books to my cart. You are an inspiration, Ali!

  35. A very interesting post. I also gave up my nightly glass of wine years ago, only because I didn’t want to want something every night. I didn’t like that feeling of really looking forward to it, if that makes sense I only drink socially now with friends or family. I do, however, object to the term poison for wine. These are studies, but other studies can say something quite different. Just remember, the healthiest and longest living folks are mostly from Italy where wine is considered almost a food, pairing magically with their wonderful cuisine. I am Italian and as a little girl was given tiny bits of red wine in water as we were not allowed to drink milk when we had pasta! (Milk was ok with the rest of our meals).

    I also appreciate the info on the full spectrum CBD. I tried the broad spectrum for sleep and it had zero effects on me although my husband loves it. . I am trying to find something natural to help me sleep. I am also not a fan of marijuana, but trace amounts sound ok.


    1. Poison is a term I was borrowing from the book – not necessarily what I think. But I wasn’t clear! Sorry! I wouldn’t drink poison but I still have a glass of wine once (or twice!) a week! And BS CBD works great for me to sleep. But full spectrum takes the edge off more. Make sure you get the FS SLEEP CBD.

    2. Hey Julie!

      Magnesium is something most of us are deficient in and it’s a miracle worker for sleep! You should look into it if you haven’t yet:) Hope this helps you!

  36. Good for you Ali. Making a positive change for yourself. Question: What did Kevin think about your relationship with alcohol? Does he drink with you? Or without you?
    Best wishes !!!

    1. Kevin drank just as much as I did – a night glass or two (not every night but most nights). He has cut back too but not as much as me. Neither of us have a problem with drinking. I just wanted to cut back more. And he still enjoys a drinks every other night or so. But it’s not a lot.

      1. “Neither of us has a problem…” Yes, you sound like you did/do. And have just swapped one coping tool with another. You’re just like renegotiating with yourself now that you’ve put this out into the world. Also, I was even trying to give you some credibility until you started dropping promo codes and more into the article.

  37. Your comments about being able to “have control” of your drinking by not having a drink one or two night is exactly what my husband used to say. He would NEVER admit that he had a drinking problem because he could “stop” or “not” drink whenever he wanted. Well, on April 20, 2021 he had a stroke that was partially contributed to his alcohol consumption. He has made a full recovery by the grace of God but what he will never recover from is missing our sons wedding on April 23, 2021 because he didn’t “have control” of his drinking. It’s been a tough road for him carrying so much guilt over missing his sons wedding … however, he has been sober for almost two years – his last drink was April 20, 2021 and we have a grandson due in July that he knows he will be here to welcome in to the world.
    I wish you all the best Ali … please keep in mind all that can be lost over “just one more glass of wine” or “I’ll have a drink tonight but not tomorrow night” – nothing is worth the guilt and shame you’d feel seeing the hurt and anger that Molly and Riley would have toward you. The drink is moth worth it.

    1. I appreciate your concern. But I know I don’t have a drinking problem any more than most of America has a drinking problem. I’ve never missed events and it’s never affected my parenting. I think your husbands situation is much different than mine. SO happy he is doing better!

  38. I don’t drink and haven’t in many years. I am lucky that I just don’t like it or the feeling of not being in control. Alcohol has been problem for my kids and others I know. It’s hard to be a mom when alcohol is a problem for your kids, thankfully that’s in the past. I had noticed you having wine often from IG. I have much respect that you cut back so much, and for others too. Alcohol overuse is so dangerous and the fact that it’s everywhere makes it hard. Be so proud of yourself. ❤️

  39. I know this is your story but Kevin was your drinking person. Has he also decided to drink less? Qas he having some of your same experiences?
    Congrats Ali on always being your best self and sharing what that looks like with your friends and family!!

  40. I commented this on your mocktail post but wanted to put here for any other girls in the same position I was! Do what works for YOU as long as it doesn’t endanger yourself or your babies! For me, alcohol endangered myself and everyone around me; CBD has NOT.

    Only feeling the need to come on here and comment after reading the negative one below. From one struggling momma to another, you are ABSOLUTELY not drug swapping and should not let ANYONE shame you for spreading awareness of other ways to relax besides “mommy wine”. I personally don’t identify as an alcoholic but definitely have a problematic relationship with alcohol. I should still be able to seek out healthier, better alternatives for relaxation myself and have been able to SUCCESSFULLY moderate with CBD-as opposed to alcohol with which I could never moderate and always had horrible binge drinking side effects. You are not doing anything wrong here and it honestly brought me so much peace and joy to see another momma not be afraid to seek out a change in her relationship with alcohol in favor for an alternative/non-addictive reward at the end of the day. Thank you for bringing awareness to these drops! I’ve only done gummies so far so I am excited to try them! Don’t stop what you’re doing! Love ya 🙂

  41. I have now been using Focl full spectrum cbd for 5 months now and I love it! I have 2 young children and when they go to bed in the evening it relaxes me and has helped me with falling asleep! I would have nights where I couldn’t fall asleep until 3 in the morning, I tried melatonin and zzquill and they sometimes worked and sometimes did not. I honestly think cbd has helped me with falling asleep and relaxing me at the end of the day!

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