Here is a question I get ALL the time. What REALLY happens in the fantasy suites? Yup, everyone wants to know if the Bachelors and Bachelorettes are getting down and dirty behind closed doors. Well, simply put, the answer is YES. So did they really “stay up for hours talking”? Well yeah they did, but let’s be real. The hours of talking happened after a few minutes of moaning – longer if you’re lucky 😉
Are there a few Bachelor/ette’s who didn’t do the nasty in the fantasy suites? Yeah sure. Sean Lowe was pretty vocal about keeping his “born again V card” during his season and I don’t think Emily Maynard even had fantasy suites. But other than those two, I’d be willing to bet ALMOST everyone else hooked up with at least one of their final 3. Noticed I said ALMOST everyone else. Can I be sure everyone did? Of course not. But us Bachelor contestants tend to hang out together. We’re a big Bachelor family. And from what I’ve heard, while hanging out with my family, is that people CAN’T WAIT to tear each others clothes off once the cameras stop rolling. Think about all the sexual tension building up for weeks, for months! I remember feeling like a kid and the camera crew/producers were my “mom” keeping an eye on me when I was with a boy. Closing the door to the fantasy suite was kicking mom out of the room and letting our teenage hormones go wild! Ha. I know that sounds weird, But it’s the best way I can describe it.
What’s more interesting, in my mind, is what happens after the couples are able to act on their sexual tension. This is where the hours of talking come into play and where the teenage, hormonal attraction can actually turn into a real relationship, True feelings, beyond just the physical. Some of you might think I’m being insensitive to conversations that are had up until this point. Sorry if you feel that way, but I’m just telling the truth. You don’t REALLY know anyone up until this point. You’re having conversations with people you BARELY know about if they want kids and if they are ready to be engaged – when what your really saying is, are you ready for kids WITH ME? Are you ready to be engaged TO ME? So weird to talk about this stuff with someone you barely know. My boyfriend and I didn’t have those conversations until we were together for 2 years! And think about it this way. You’ve spent soooo little time together. If I had to guess, you spend less than 30 hours with each person up until the fantasy suites. Crazy right? And then you get engaged a week later! It’s all so insane. But in a good way! I know so many people who said they knew they would marry their husband or wife the first day they met them. Can that happen on this show? Of course! Does that mean you really KNOW the person going into the fantasy suites. Not really.
The great thing about the fantasy suites happening a week early this season is that Kaitlyn will have so much more clarity on who she should be with in the end. Those HOURS of talking will take all of her convoluted emotions and help her see who she really has a connection with – when the cameras are off.
Can’t wait to see what happens on Monday! What do you guys think about my thoughts on the fantasy suites? Are you surprised? Does anything I said shock you? Sound off in the comments below.
Come back tomorrow for my full Blog on tonight’s Bachelorette
22 thoughts on “Fantasy Suites”
But do they really sleep with all three? And is it three consecutive nights? Must be hard…
Ali you are a talented gal. This article was fantastic and covered everything I had always I had been thinking about but never asked. I love your take on things!!
1 nights stands are not a way to gauge whether someone is husband material. Its crazy to think that a night of sex can decide that. No wonder most couples dont make it to the wedding. They should have spend more time getting an emotional connection in the fantasy suite.
I dunno. I guess I’m a little old fashioned. I couldn’t possibly sleep with three different men, that I hardly knew no less. I wouldn’t be able to face myself. I would just feel pretty used. But, that’s me, another generation.
This is the most honest anyone has written about the FS. Thanks
I love the article and can appreciate getting intimate during that time together but I only wonder whether after Kaitlyn told Shawn that she had moved too quickly after having sex with Nick earlier…that she would then sleep with Nick again in the Fantasy Suite…will she feel compelled to tell Shawn that she slept with Nick for a 2nd time? And if not, then why tell him about the 1st time?
Just thinking out loud;) and I just love Kaitlyn, so really…whatever she chooses to do and whom ever she chooses in the end…I’m so excited for her and just hope it works out!!:)
And I should add that obviously, we don’t know that she slept with Nick a 2nd time…blah blah. I’m seriously over invested in her season;)
Well, she was probably pushed by producers to confess. Best believe it lol Also she wanted to avoid Shawn being blindsided by the info. A producer probably warned her that he might hear it from one of the guys or a staff member before she had the chance to warn him. Try to think of it in the context of the show, not normal dating world/etiquette. A contestant expects to share his woman in the F3 but to know that she choose to hook up prior is hurtful and will cause paranoia, even in the most confident person. The contestant is bound to wonder "what was it about that person that made you lost control, why didnt you try to lose control with me, this means you like them more??" etc.
Obviously Im way over-invested too LOL 🙂
Loved your honest, mature comments!!! Keep them coming!!!!
Nothing you said was shocking or surprising. It was as it seems. I think having fantasy suite week this early should be something they continue doing. Families should be a last step…enjoy your blog 🙂
Ali you’re the best! Love your fashion sense and your honesty! I think everyone knew this deep down, but never wanted to believe it! Glad Kaitlyn is making it less awkward. Keep doin’ your thang! So happy that you found love!
Great to hear your thoughts on the FS nights. Feel like it is disheartening to be sleeping with the 3 finalists……how will the 1 that gets picked feel? Just doesn’t feel right, but that is my feelings.
Ali, this isn’t really on subject, but I’m curious if any of the guys who get eliminated say things to the lead about the remaining guys. Like, would anyone ever say "Nick really is a jerk, be careful." Or "Shawn really is the best guy who is left." Or do they not even go there?
Amen! People who are shocked by this need to wake up. Sorry if that sounds harsh but come on people! Intamicy is a huge part of a relationship. No, not the only part but a huge part! Thanks for being real. You’ve always been one of my faves! xo
This is not shocking in the slightest lol. You’re not going to buy a Porsche without taking it for a test drive, right?
I 100% agree that sex can be such a powerful factor when it comes to relationships. To me sex either confirms the good things you were already feeling about that person or tells you that it’s not going to work. The intimacy you build with someone through sex is so important.
What would surprise me is if everyone did sleep with all three. I would think by that point most people would have it narrowed to the one or two they have the strongest feelings for and just do it with them, but maybe not? lol
This does not surprise me at all. Given that I talk to many past ette’s/ladies, I know that sex happens.. I know at least 1 bachelor who slept with all 3.. From what I understand it’s mostly 1 or 2 at the most with the ette’s.. I mean we all know you were only intimate with R. I think it’s necessary, if the sex isn’t good, that is a wrap.. It has to be.. #SorryNotSorry just keeping it real. How sucky would that be to wait for the one you want and it be terrible so you kinda wish you had done it with the 1st or 2nd one instead. bahahahah!
Def agree that the fantasy suites are very important!!! Could be a deal breaker for some :-/
Thought it was very interesting how different ‘the next morning’ was for each guy.
Also… After meeting Shawns family, at the hotel, Kaitlin just left her wine glass (full) on the table and left. Found that a little weird. Think we can tell who she’s gonna pick.
Not shocking at all! What is shocking to me, is Chris Harrison’s handwriting. Has anyone spoke on that? Does he really write those cards!?! #beaUTifUL
My first thought is that Frank from your season should be kicking himself. A lot.
I also wonder what you thought of Kaitlin making Shawn strip on camera on the golf course. As a guy, I wouldn’t have a problem doing it, but what if the sexes were reversed and a bachelor did that to one of the bachelorettes. Would that be okay?
I’m not surprised. I think you nailed it. Well, this bachelorette couldn’t wait for the fantasy suite! She claims she is there to find a husband! Not at all! I hope she picks Nick! They deserve each other! Shawn is way to good for her! She is the worst bachelorette EVER!
I think you hit it dead on ali!! Your truthfulness about the show and fantasy suits being a changing point is huge. Reality is a lot of majority of people now a days live with their boyfriends before even considering engagement. Reality is most people do thrive on their sexual fantasy and desires before continuing a serious relationship. Thanks for sharing your honest opinion with us.